


feeblemind

by grumpy_squirrel



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Fantasy Racism, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Other characters - mentioned - Freeform, Probably ooc, Warning: Trent Ikithon, because Ikithon is The Worst, certain liberties for spell mechanics, ep 97 spoilers, honestly I dunno why he's there. my brain hates me, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-21
Updated: 2020-03-21
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:35:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23245630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grumpy_squirrel/pseuds/grumpy_squirrel
Summary: feeblemind - you blast the mind of a creature that you can see within range, attempting to shatter its intellect and personality. on a failed save, the creature's intelligence and charisma scores become 1. the creature can't cast spells, activate magic items, understand language, or communicate in any intelligible way. the creature can, however, identify its friends, follow them, and even protect them.The Mighty Nein had wonderful time at Travelercon. But where is Essek?
Relationships: Caduceus Clay/Fjord, Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast, Jester Lavorre/Beauregard Lionett/Yasha, The Mighty Nein & Essek Thelyss
Comments: 10
Kudos: 255





	feeblemind

**Author's Note:**

> Essek server is the worst. And the best.
> 
> I'm not entirely happy with this but I have no brainpower to work on this more. I might go back at some point and edit it a little. I borrowed some lines and concepts from our brainstorming, I hope that’s okay. Let me know if there's something I forgot to tag!
> 
> This fic was written and posted exclusively to AO3. If you're seeing it elsewhere - they do not have my permission to display or share it #

“Hi Essek! We had fun! Our schedule is free, we can do good things now! Did you have anything in mind? Are you home? Should we meet you there?”

Jester waits, and waits. And waits. But there’s no response. And even at his most annoyed Essek would say _something,_ if only because it’s Jester.

* * *

They arrive back at Rosohna and guards acknowledge them briefly. Everything seems normal, until they try to enter Essek’s house. Not feeling like using another of Jester’s messages, Veth shoots a crossbow bolt through the gate and it lands in the middle of the door with a springing noise. They wait outside, but there’s no sign of him being there. A confused servant greets them with a shrug through the window, gesticulating as if they’re trapped inside without a key. Which would be pretty alarming if the Mighty Nein cared about her fate. Caduceus hopes she has food at least.

When it’s clear Essek isn’t home, half of the group takes a brief stop at the Marble Tomes and half goes back to the Bastion, but nobody’s seen the Shadowhand this week; and that’s weird. Well, maybe not so weird by his standards, but people mention they'd hear from him at least.

“Something’s not right,” Caduceus hums to no one in particular.

“Should I scry on him? I’m gonna try and hope for the best!”

Jester almost doesn’t connect her scry but with the extra push from the Traveler’s new-freed powers, they just barely make it through. She sees a place they've seen once before in person - when inspecting the beacon before the peace talks - the oddly clinical halls of Vergesson Sanatorium. And Essek is there. Kneeling on the cold floor of a small square room with no windows, but a bright lamp in one corner. He’s gently floating - not bound, although definitely looking like he doesn’t belong here in this ugly red robe, his gaze unfocused and confused, squinting. The scry blinks out abruptly when someone approaches from behind the scrying orb.

“So… Essek is in huge trouble, you guys,” Jester whispers, shocked; her eyes wide and rapidly watering.

“What do you mean, Jester?”

“Caleb! Essek, he, he is-” she can’t even finish before she bursts with a wail of unjust scream and more tears. The group gives her space, hugging and patting her back and shoulders gently, reassuringly.

She calms down after a long while. “What are we still doing here?! Essek needs help!”

“Jessie… slow down. What’s happening?” Beau frowns.

“Assembly’s got him. I think. They have those anti-scrying necklaces, right? I saw- he was-” A violent sob shakes her whole body. “Caleb. The, the- sanatorium, ugh! We saw the wrong beacon there!”

The silence hangs above them like a guillotine, waiting to drop and take them out with its swing. Caleb gapes, wanting to say something but unable to process what.

* * *

They come up with a plan that on paper will work flawlessly. They know there’s a very tight timing and no room for mistakes, but they proceed anyway. Caleb casts Seeming on everyone, making them look like they work there. Horses take them from Rexxentrum as close as they can get, and the rescue mission starts for good. The spell drops few steps away from the building, repelled by protective wards. Which they realise too late, yet throw all caution to the wind anyway. They march inside with determination, disguise or not.

* * *

They find Essek, who’s surprisingly easy to free. No guards, no chains. He glides along with a smile, holding onto Caleb’s sleeve. Quiet, carefree, odd. Absent. Caleb’s never seen Essek like this, but he has a hunch that he knows precisely what _this_ is.

“I can’t,” Caleb whispers. He rushes forward, leaving the drow confused and with two clerics by his sides, leading him behind the building. Caleb starts drawing a teleportation circle back to Rosohna, but just as he’s finishing the last few lines and they’re about to step through it, a wave of rogue spells targets him, Caduceus and Jester. No one notices from behind, unable to react in time, but Essek’s brows furrow slightly and he sidesteps towards the spell, shielding the redhead from its effects. Seemingly okay, Caleb finishes the incantation, hurrying everyone and pushing Essek gently into the circle. They’re fine. _Everything is fine._

* * *

The group apologizes before guards of the Lucid Bastion manage to pull out their blades in their direction. While still on edge, they let the group pass through. They step outside, exhaling their loudest and heaviest breath of relief yet. The Mighty Nein just can’t catch a break, can they? Beau tries to lighten the mood with a small joke about how the weird nocturnal plant growing on the wall of the castle kinda looks like a butt, but when it doesn’t land, her face scrunches.

“Wow. Wow, really? Nothing? And we risk our lives for you, and you’re not gonna even thank us, Thelyss?”

“He can’t,” Caleb murmurs under his nose, visibly distraught, eyes darting between everyone and no one in particular.

“What was that?”

“He _can’t.”_

“What do you mean ‘he can’t’?”

“Look at him, Beauregard. Does he look like he can respond?”

“He looks fine to me. Still floats.”

“I can’t know for sure, I’d have to identify what spell is affecting him… But I have a suspicion, and I’d really appreciate your support right now because I’m trying to keep it together.“

“Geez,” she sighs, but her face softens. “Okay, I’ll try. We’ll try, right Jester?”

Beau stops for a moment to look behind her. She notices her tiefling friend twirling in one spot, pointing at something that isn’t even there. Or maybe at Caduceus, who’s standing still, blinking absent-mindedly as the distance between him and the group grows.

“Oh come on, this isn’t the time!”

“What’s going on?” Fjord turns around and walks towards the monk.

“No. No no no nonono…” Caleb shuts his eyes and his breath quickens. “No. Scheisse.”

“What the fuck,” Veth mutters, which doesn’t really help the situation.

Caleb pulls out the silver wire and silently wraps it around Jester’s wrist, tying the other end to Beau’s arm. He binds Fjord with Caduceus, then finally secures Essek to his own wrist with small help from Yasha. Beau doesn’t protest when halfway to the Xorhaus Jester’s hand links with her own.

* * *

Fjord’s eyes widen the instant he hears the door chimes. “Caduceus, your staff!” How did he not notice it’s missing sooner? He breaks the thread, hands the loose end to Yasha and rushes back where they came from, cursing under his breath.

Veth paces impatiently, grumbling and swearing a lot. Yasha offers her her flask back, but she quickly refuses, never stopping for a beat in her rant. “-and it wouldn’t even happen if we didn’t go saving this fucking traitor! No, thank you, I’m already drunk on my nerves. He’s put us all in danger! Again! He can’t keep getting away with this!”

“Veth,” Caleb pleads, his voice weak and shaky. That seems to finally calm her down enough to give him space to proceed with diagnosis. Essek squirms when the cold pearl Caleb uses for identifying ritual touches his forehead. “I know, friend. This is hard for me too.”

Fjord’s back with Caduceus’s staff just in time to hear Caleb curse. “Shit, I knew it. No, it’s worse than I thought.”

“What’s going on, Caleb?” Beau insists.

“So, dear Beauregard, there’s this little spell called Feeblemind. Do you know what it does?”

“How the fuck am I supposed to know?”

“It shatters someone’s mind, and personality.”

“Like for a day, or...?”

“It’s really hard to shrug it off, Veth. Impossible in some cases, even. Is this a good enough punishment now?” He snarls, but there’s no real bite behind it.

“You know it’s not what I meant.”

“Time out, argue later! What’s up with Jester and Caduceus?”

“Yes, right. Thank you, Fjord. For reminding us what’s truly important.”

Caleb repeats the process on the other two, his face turning paler with each completed ritual. Half an hour passes on nervous glances and more people joining in pacing around the common space.

“No way,” Beau shakes her head. This can’t be happening.

“All three,” the wizard whispers. “I can’t.”

“So they’re just gonna stay like this forever?”

“He is not a lost cause. _They_ are not a lost cause. It’ll take a while, ja, and I’ll have to get creative but… We can fix them. That’s what we do, we fix...”

“Okay, so what do we do?”

“Take care of them, for now.”

“We’ll do our best. Just like they’d do for us.” And everyone knows Yasha is right.

* * *

They move the furnitue around and grab every pillow in the house to add to the stack in the middle of the big, too big, room. Without Jester’s usual energy the Xorhaus feels almost empty. Fjord and Beau try to prepare dinner and almost catch the kitchen on fire, so they end up with humble burnt bread with cheese on top of it, which is still appreciated. The faces of both clerics light up for a brief moment before turning back to their new, dull selves. It’s painful to watch for everyone involved.

Essek seems restless, clinging to everyone he can reach, wide eyes and a hint of smile. Veth shrugs him off from her tiny shoulders, but Beau ruffles his hair with a loud sigh. Sigh so loud it startles him, and Yasha wraps a gentle arm tightly around him. Jester and Caduceus join the pile and Essek cuddles to all three, and at this point it’s a lot, too much for Caleb to bear. Knowing the drow would never be so affectionate under normal circumstances makes him feel even more sad and guilty, and he feels the need to leave.

Unwelcome, yet familiar voice of Trent Ikithon interrupts his train of thought. “How’s your docile crick pet doing, Bren? It was useless to us in such broken state, consider it a gift.” Caleb leans away and retches, concerned Essek pats his hair with far more recognition in his eyes than the spell would ever allow him to. When Essek opens his mouth, Caleb expects to hear some incomprehensible baby talk. He’s taken aback when the slurred gibberish almost sounds like ‘friend.’

Everyone gasps, and Caleb realises Yasha pulls him in to the cuddle pile with a small smile. “He’s still there.”

“Ja I know,” he mutters in bewilderement when Essek cups his face in his hands and traces over his freckles, the touch both familiar yet so unfamiliar to both of them. Caleb’s trying not to break, it's heartbreaking to see such an intelligent, proud man so broken.

At some point Fjord wraps himself around everyone and squeezes them tightly, instantly decides that felt awkward and tries to leave, but Caduceus’s weak grip on his calf is all it takes for him to stay, although they separate from the group for individual cuddles in a corner, and it feels oddly comforting despite it all. If ever confronted about it, Fjord would deny it, but he sneaks a quick kiss on Clay’s forehead.

Beau pulls out Jester’s sketchbook and slides it over to her with a pen. The trickster flips through it for a moment and starts scribbling upside down in the middle of the part with blank pages.

“Fuck. How are you holding, Caleb?” Beau nudges her best friend while Jester is busy drawing, tongue sticking out in focus.

“I’ve been staring at this wall for three hours and twenty five minutes, so. You know, been better.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Save it for him.”

Jester proudly presents them the results. It’s abstract doodles at best, but Beau nods vigorously, making up the meaning behind them all to humor Jester as best she can. In the meantime, Jester manages to braid her own hair together with Beau and Yasha’s hair and flashes them a proud grin. Beau untangles them gently and soon after they all fall asleep on stacks of pillows placed earlier on the floor, drifting off to a vision of Traveler’s distraught but proud expression blinking on the ceiling.

* * *

The next day is a little better, once they settled a little in this new situation. Veth and Yasha are doing their best to keep the tribe together, and not fall apart themselves. The breakfast they make together is completely unedible, so they leave for some light shopping.

Fjord makes Caduceus some tea. It’s not perfect, he probably boiled it. Caduceus drinks it anyway and burns his tongue on it a little. Fjord helps him cool it down, and the cleric blows on his hair instead. His paladin whispers with tears in his eyes, "Please, Wildmother. Let him be okay."

Caleb summons Frumpkin, in his cat form at last, and sends him to make rounds. “You’re on cuddle duty today. Be extra cute.”

* * *

The few following nights at Xorhaus feel heavy. No one really knows what to do with themselves, angry at how powerless they are. Caleb has a plan, he says. He’s preparing for a waiting game. He can’t do what he wants alone, but he hopes their allies won’t ask too many questions.

"First stop… Nicodranas?"

"Ja, I have a favor to ask of Yussa."

"Can we come with you?"

_"We?_ Fjord, I don't think taking the whole group is a good idea. Especially Jester..."

"We, as in me and Caduceus. I was hoping, maybe seeing Wildmother's Lighthouse could bring him back..."

Caleb has no heart to tell him it won't work. He bites his lip and nods sadly. "I can take you, yeah. Please keep an eye on him."

"I will."

“I’m coming too!” No one questions Veth’s screech. “I have a husband to talk things through with!”

* * *

"Yussa, this is important. Could you teach me how to send magical messages over long distance?"

"Will you remember to announce your arrival if I do that?"

"...Probably not."

Yussa nods in thought, studying Caleb's distraught expression really carefully.

"Fine."

Caleb copies the spell and instantly messages Reani, asking if she can go back to Uthodurn as soon as possible, and when would that be.

* * *

“Phew! You’re giving me a real workout these days!”

“I’m sorry. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t so urgent.”

“Just because I like you~”

Reani casts greater restoration on all three, bringing them back to normal.

“Thank you! Thank you so much. We owe you everything,” Caleb keeps thanking her even after she’s lost interest.

“So, how about those cupcakes, Jester?”

“Well… I ate like most of them before they went really stale. Oh! We could buy more cupcakes! I’ll share the fresh ones with you!”

Reani laughs with Jester; while Caleb draws a circle back in some alley, ready to finish it whenever they’re ready.

* * *

Essek’s too proud to acknowledge anything that happened the past three weeks, but he’s trying to express gratitude in his own way, and Frumpkin gets extra scritches. No one’s willing to call him out but they all noticed he started showing affection more openly. Especially Beau - who tends to punch him lightly in the shoulder after a really good snarky joke, dragging him to cuddle with her, Jester and Yasha soon after; and Veth - who sat down next to him one of these days and welcomed him to the Mighty Nein once more, no catches or grudges this time.

He listens intently as Caduceus explains Fjord how to properly make tea, amused how they bicker like an old married couple. Or what he assumes that’d sound like, the only reference he has is a new book Jester bought him as light reading for their camping trip to the beach in Nicodranas. Essek’s never seen without his parasol. Or Caleb, for that matter. He could really get used to feeling the warmth of the sunrise every morning.


End file.
